top 10 of the week

1) my new favorite holiday, April 16th. It’s true people, the Kersey marriage has lasted one year! It was so fun getting texts, phone calls, cards in the mail, and encouragement. It was more fun than my birthday, because on my birthday it’s awkward to be “all about me”- Anniversaries are awesome because I can be all about Bobby and he can be all about me- win win! I’m sure I’ll have a whole post devoted to the year coming soon.

2) When I told my kids about my anniversary, they were so excited. Our conversation went a little like this:

students: “Mrs. Kersey, what did your husband get you for your anniversary?”
me: “He got me a necklace”–which I then displayed to everyone the awesomeness of the necklace, which is a map of Afghanistan– “and a bench, because our other one got stolen.”
students: (in shocked voices) “What!? He got you what?! Huh?”
one girl: “You mean…like, he got you a b-i-t-c-h?”

2) My mother-in-law Betty’s birthday. She was so kind to share her birthday with our wedding day last year. Betty is definitely the lady version of Bobby- they both have dry sense of humors and like to get new cars. She’s supportive and servant-hearted and loves her family fiercely.

3) The trick I’ve learned with Bobby is to never say “I wish you would…” or “Why don’t you..” or “you should…” but to always say “I like it when…” I’ve learned 4th grade boys are no different. Two boys in particular are clearly the cool, cute boys in the grade and they know it. They usually goof off in class, don’t do their work or even show up to school half the time. In small group we were talking about the word influence, which I then used these two boys as an example. I explained how these boys can be a good influence by paying attention in class and other kids will, or how if they come in without homework and don’t participate, other kids follow that. Since then they have been on their game, so involved in group discussions, paying attention- so I was able to brag about them in front of all their teachers and all their classmates. Their smiles on their faces were priceless.

4) When the kid who is the shyest, quietest kid volunteers over and over to read outloud, makes jokes and isn’t afraid to speak up in class.

5) Short but fantastic conversation with Suzanne and David at small group about grace, brokenness, and sin.

6) In effort to be healthy I got some vitamins. They are gummies. And they taste amazing.

7) We went to a 3 year old birthday party last week with a train theme- therefore I put a Thomas the train tattoo on my hand. No matter how hard I scrub it hasn’t come off yet so I’ve gotten a LOT of comments about it. Mainly the teachers I work with make fun of me, while my kindergarteners were so excited about it. The plus side is another teacher went and bought me more fake tattoos! Yay!

8) Not feeling tired, anxious, exhausted, nervous, or worried this week…maybe because I ate more fruit and vegetables, maybe because I went running twice, maybe because I’m not thinking how I can explain a situation in a twitter-worthy tweet- but mainly because I made the decision to quit worrying. I cannot compare myself to people who have been teaching for 15+ years. I’m doing the best that I can. The Lord will equip me and strengthen me for His work. As wise friend Meredith told me before “Comparison kills contentment”, I’m here to attest that it’s vital to joy to literally hold up the shield an extinguish the enemy’s lies.

9) Greg and Brienne’s rehearsal dinner was beautiful, excellent service (Napa Cafe), touching, fun, and perfect. It was fun catching up with friends and celebrating a couple that desires more than anything to make Christ magnified through their wedding.

10) Even though it hasn’t happened yet, I’m sure Greg and Brienne’s wedding will be the best part of the week!

Things that didn’t make it to the top 10:
1) Getting the estimate to replace our dinosaur of a heating/AC unit. Ouch.

2) Working on the 12 page final for one of my teaching classes. Ugh.

3) A couple of months ago I was given a bunch of kindergartners to teach. I have about 20 that I see in small groups once a week. When I went to pick up my 3 Thursday afternoon girls, one of them had a bag of ice up to her nose and blood all over her shirt. Her teacher said she was picking her nose so hard that it started bleeding. I told her she could change her shirt before we went upstairs to my room, so little girl runs to the bathroom. She then runs out, her shirt unbuttoned, her holding her shirt together and holding her other shirt
up. “My other shirt got wet!” she said, handing me the soaked shirt. “How did it get wet? Did it fall in the toilet?” I asked. “Uh huh…” Yuck.

Advertisements

katie lately

I think I have begun at least 15 blog posts the past month, only to be written at incredible length that even I wouldn’t go back and read, or they didn’t make sense and made a million rabbit trails. It’s because my mind is going crazy. Part of the problem is that I have so much in my head, I haven’t journaled in probably a month (and I have to journal for sanity), and I spend wayyy too much time on facebook, twitter, and pinterest. I’m just going to be honest about that. I like people and I like to look at their pictures, read their funny comments about the day, catch up on news and look for cool things to do to my home. There are so many other voices, stories, opinins and ideas in my head, along with my own, that I can’t handle it all. My friend Meredith gave up social media for Lent, and I’ve decided, now after the actual Lenten season, to also give up facebook, twitter, and pinterest for the week…and indefinitely. I have a hyperactive brain that runs 90 to nothing, and already three days away from these things have calmed me down and given me to time to do the things I actually need to do. It’s kind of like a cleanse for my mind. Which now I’m thinking I should probably do a real cleanse for my body since I have eaten so many marshmallows and chocolate chips the past few weeks. And another thing- I totally struggle with comparing myself to people, and for me, social media feeds into my horrible insecurity. It’s nice to have one less thing to fight for my attention.

For real though, my mind is going crazy. Bobby has asked me multiple times to write things down so I can remember what I need to do, but let’s be honest here…I HATE making lists. I am anti-list, anti-checking things off- it just doesn’t do it for me. I feel proud of myself when I can just remember things on my own, kind of like my guy-pride of never asking for directions and wanting to trust my inner-GPS that doesn’t actually exist. Unfortunately, the lack of writing things down has led to stress that I can’t even pinpoint when I’m awake. I haven’t slept well in months and I can’t tell you how many crazy dreams I have had about work-related issues or people turning into monkeys (thank you, young adult dystopian post-apocalyptic fiction). The weird thing is, when I’m awake I am happy, grateful, and fully enjoying this season of life, pretty unaware of my stress level. There’s this huge underlying stress of not being good enough for my job or good enough for my kids, and it’s so big that I just don’t think about it. We have TCAP, our dreaded standardized test, coming up in a few weeks. Apparently TCAP is the biggest deal of life and we have a huge job to prepare our kids for it. I worry that what I do is not good enough for them, that I provide no preparation or help and my kids will stress when they see how hard the test is. Bobby prayed over me last night after I broke down crying, and I started today with the knowledge that I am not these kids’ savior, and if I am doing this job for the Lord He WILL enable me and give me strength. Over and over I can hear Him say “This is MY world Katie.”

All that to say, I am wanting to be quiet in my mind and focus it on the Lord. I can see that I hold onto fear and am not fully embracing the grip of grace that the Lord provides. If it means trading social media interaction for more prayer and actual interaction with people, so be it.